Righteous Insanity

Thoughts from one tired writer

The last three weeks have been exhausting. I have a busy enough fall, with my full-time job, being a husband and father, Righteous Insanity, student teaching, an online class, and play rehearsals. On top of all of this, God put something on my mind that had to be put down. It took two weeks of work, but I finished the first draft today.

 

God doesn't come when it's convenient for us. Often it's when we're already too busy. But he gives us the strength we need. I found that to be true these last two weeks.

 

The project is officially in "first draft" status. I'm hoping to find a few folks with some spare time to give it a read and give me their thoughts. It's another work of fiction. Not science fiction, though. Think one of those business "parable" books that your quirky co-worker with the frequent buyer card to the Franklin-Covey store likes to pass around and share. Except there's spiritual meaning beneath the story about the business man.

 

Much as I want to be free of office life forever and be in a classroom full-time, I know this wouldn't have come about without the years I spent dwelling in cubicles. (Yes, Mike Judge and Ricky Gervais deserve some credit too.) Again, God always has a plan and a purpose for where you are. Even if his plans don't match up with yours.

 

A friend told me yesterday, if you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans. Lot of truth in that. Lot of blessing in breaking your plans for his.

Define Christian

How do you define a Christian film? How do you define Christian fiction, or Christian drama? If your definition of a Christian story means it has Christian characters who learn or present a Biblically based Christian message, then by definition, Jesus never told a single Christian story.

 

Jesus told stories that expressed truth. You can find real truth and beauty in stories written by believers (Dostoyevsky) and non-believers (Joss Whedon). These are stories that do not beat you over the head with a Bible, but carry within them messages that can sharpen us as believers. One still has to be discerning about what stories are full of truth and what stories are full of junk, especially when the author is not a believer. But discernment is one of those skills the Holy Spirit wants to develop in us anyway, right?

 

Perhaps it's time we scrap the whole idea of Christian film, literature, and drama, and just become film makers, writers, and playwrights. I'm not saying we should become watered down, wishy-washy writers like the crossover Christian pop artists of the 90's. Just that we need to stop looking at film, drama, and books as modified sermons and get down to the business of creating REAL film, drama, and literature.

South Park vs. Family Guy

South Park and Family Guy are both very vulgar shows, so if you choose to skip this blog rather than read what I have to say - and the lesson within - I understand.

There's been something of a feud between these two shows. Both are extremely funny, and both are run by very funny, very creative guys. But there's now a clear cut winner when it comes to who the better writers are: South Park.

For some reason, Seth MacFarlane has become increasingly preachy with Family Guy this year. Although past seasons featured episodes with morals, the show has become very heavy handed and in your face - particularly last night's episode about legalizing pot. Much as I enjoy Seth's humor and creativity, when he has something to say, he has all the subtlety of a jackhammer - putting him in the same category as about 90% of us who write drama and film for the church. And as someone who disagrees with Seth on everything from religion to politics, it comes off hostile and abrasive.

Trey and Matt, on the other hand, write stories that teach week after week - and most of the time, you don't even realize it. Sure, Stan or Kyle will frequently give a little moral lesson at the end, much like Mike Brady did back in the day. But the real genius in the show is ther symbolism created within the stories that drives home a message on the subconscious level - frequently through gross-out humor. More often than not, the message is something we can all agree on.

Another key difference between the two is the humor - particularly, who do the show creators skewer the most? Both shows are known for attacking Christianity and conservatives, but Family Guy stops short most of the time when attacking people who agree with the writers' worldview. South Park attacks everybody. Every faith, every political party, every side of every issue. Come to think of it, South Park is far more far more fair and balanced in their parodies than any news story you'll see on Fox News (or CNN or MSNBC).

News flash: when you make fun of yourself as well as those who disagree with you, those who disagree will be more apt to listen to you. Someone needs to remind the writers at SNL about that.

Again, I am not endorsing these shows, nor advocating the type of gross-out humor they employ. I am merely pointing out a comparison between two rival shows that demonstrate how we, as Christians, should approach the stories we tell. In our effort to tell stories the way Jesus did, it's nice to look at a concrete example now and then and remind ourselves of the right way and the wrong way to deliver our message.

Never write skits when you're angry

One thing I have learned over the years: never write a topical skit when you're angry. When a news story comes up that makes your blood boil and fills you with righteous indignation, do not - DO NOT - channel that rage into anything you intend to use on a Sunday morning. Write if you must, but delete it when you're done and start fresh when you've calmed down.

 

The problem with writing angry is, no matter how right you may be (or think you are), you're not going to win anyone over with your venom. You'll only tick them off and discredit yourself as any kind of an authority on anything. I've written some pretty angry, inflammatory material that has never (and will never) see the light of day.

 

Good drama that connects and persuades doesn't do so by kicking the door down and spraying the living room with machine gunblasts. It sneaks in the back door and throws on the lights. Look at the parables. Heck, look at fairy tales. The best stories are never in your face. At first glance, they appear to be about someone else. But when you look a little closer, you see your reflection inside.

 

Sketchwriters are not meant to pound the podium. Our job is to yank the seat out beneath our audience just before they sit down. A little subtley and symbolism can go a long way.

Taking Offense

I'm finishing a series of dramas for a kids retreat based on "The Suite Life of Zack and Cody." Sounds like a fun time, right? Tell that to the parents out there who have a problem with Zack and Cody. In addition to their rude, disrespectful treatment of adults (and other kids), some later episodes had these boys, barely teenagers, trying to get some alone time with girls. This sort of content has made Zack and Cody taboo in many Christian homes. But does that mean you can't use them for a ministry program?

 

If you write for kids, and if you choose to use or spoof popular characters, someone is going to take offense. You can't use Harry Potter; he promotes witchcraft and the occult. You can't use SpongeBob; he promotes the homosexual agenda. When I was a kid, Christian watchdogs issued warnings against characters like the Smurfs and the Care Bears, both thought to be subliminal lures to the "dark side" of New Age beliefs. And who can forget all those sermons we heard about kids becoming demon possessed thanks to Dungeons and Dragons?

 

Of course back in the day, Willow Creek did a whole series of sketches featuring the Church Lady. Anybody who ever saw the Church Lady on TV knows how crass and offensive "she" could be. But did the adults complain? Of course not. They loved it.

 

Pop culture is a great way to connect with any age audience. Just be aware, whatever you choose to use, somebody some place is going to take offense, especially if you're working with kids. Be smart, and when in doubt, ask you ministry leader or some parents if it's a good idea. And don't be afraid to speak up. A children's minister I worked with once was very grateful when I told her it wasn't such a hot idea to have a kid say "Git 'Er Done" in her children's service.

What's wrong with this picture?

I just changed the ink cartridge in the fax machine here at work. After removing the old cartridge, I put it in the envelope provided so I could drop it in the mail and recycle, thus saving the environment.

 

I then threw away the cardboard box that contained the cartridge, the plastic baggie that contained the cartridge inside the box, the plastic strip that had to be removed before installation, the plastic wrap that contained the recycling envelope, and the directions for installing the cartridge.

 

And of course, this ink cartridge will go back to H-P and become another ink cartridge - a savvy move on H-P's part to reduce material cost.

 

There's a metaphor in this story. I just haven't found it yet.

No one likes and "Anti-Dentite"

An old Audio Adrenaline lyrics that I once loved and laughed about came to me this morning - and bothered me a lot. It's from the song "My God" on their first album, and the line is this: "Yesterday, a man came up to me and said, 'Rev. Moody, I believe in a big fat cow.' I said, 'My God died on the cross, not at McDonalds!' Hallelujah!"

 

The song's chorus makes reference to a Hindu god being an old cow and Buddha being a fat man, among others, and the song is about the difference between my God and all the other so-called gods in other religions. I loved this song when it first came out, but years later I can't help but think that it's not the best way to deliver this kind of message.

 

Let's say an atheist, say Bill Maher, comes to you and wants to make a point about Christianity. But when he does, he puts it in the form of a very mocking, condescending joke. Are you going to listen to him? I doubt it. He may be 100% right in his statement, but because of who he is and how he delivers his message, you're not going to listen.

 

Maher has a lot of contempt for Christianity (along with Judaism and Islam), so by an large, Christians are not going to listen to his criticism. By the same token, we're not going to earn the ears of Hindus, Muslims, Buddhists, Jehovah's Witnesses, Mormons, or any other faiths by mocking and insulting them. Doesn't matter if you say you respect them; if you mock what they believe, you are being disrespectful.

 

That's not to say there's not a place for sarcasm among Christians. We just need to learn to aim it at ourselves. There is a lot of hypocrisy in my life and yours that deserves criticism, and nothing makes the medicine go down easier than laughter.

 

Remember when Jerry Seinfeld was labeled and "anti-dentite" for telling dentist jokes? It's the same kind of deal. Christians are not good at taking a joke, but when we do, we are much more likely to take a joke from a fellow believer than someone who does not believe at all.

 

I wish more Christians were able to take a joke. We could learn a lot if we humbled ourselves enough to truly listen to what is being said. And we might just earn the respect - and the ears - of some non-believers along the way.

Jedi Mind Tricks for Writers

It was mid-August, 2003, sometime around midnight. One of the girls from the RI touring group was over, talking on her cell to a long distance friend while I stared at a blank computer screen trying to write a Christmas play.

 

This was nothing new. Christmas season for me starts in July, when the early birds begin planning for their holiday services, and typically run through the Saturday before, when one or two last minute orders come through for scripts people needed yesterday. This night, I was blocked. Completely blocked. I usually relished getting to Christmas in the summer months. But it just wasn't clicking.

 

I don't know where the idea came from. What I remember is what happened next. I got into the closet and pulled down the Christmas lights box. I got two strands of lights down, ran them around the room, and plugged them in. Then, I put on a Christmas movie. Before I was done setting up, I was in the mood, the block was freed, and I was back to work. Half an hour later, my friend came in the room and collapsed in laughter. Then we settled in to watch Christmas Vacation until 2 AM.

 

Sometimes the best thing for writer's block is anything but writing. Find something that needs cleaning, run to the store for something you don't need, or do something like the Christmas lights gimmick to trick yourself into having the right mindset.

 

Stuck on a kids lesson? Get some juice and cookies. Need ideas for a college worship program? Go to Starbucks and get some chai. Or better yet, find some indie coffee house, preferably with a guy playig bongos out front. Writing for youth ministry? Try Doritos andMountain Dew. And music. LOUD music.

 

I'm being a little facetious, but there's real value in little distractions like this. Get your mind off your block for just a few seconds, and that's usually all it takes. Besides, it's fun to do something pointless every now and then. Keeps you young, keeps you from taking things to serious. And even if it doesn't free the block, it almost always puts you in a better mood.

The Writer's Temptation

The temptation for the Christian writer is this: when we learn something of value in the Christian life, we analyze it, put it in our own words, and put it back out there as some form of writing without ever letting it impact our own lives.

 

Today, I was reading a book that really struck me with a powerful insight. Immediately, the imagination kicked in. I started in on a story about robots (sorry, I am a geek), an allegory to depict what I had drawn from the text so that others might also see.

 

Then I stopped, and looked at myself. I was no different than I was before. Not that a single sentence or paragraph can transform your mind in a heartbeat, but there wasn't even intention toward allowing myself to be changed. Just the impulse to repackage and release my own interpretation into the wild. I'm still the same grumpy, grumbling customer service rep that I am most days when I'd rather be with my family or some place writing. 

 

So many times, a scripture or a devotion or an article I read ends up spawning a skit, a short story, or even a film script. (But never poetry; I used to, but I really stink at it. I mean it's bad, really, really bad.) But the lesson that so inspired me is quickly forgotten and filed away.

 

I put the story aside, and decided to meditate on what I had read. I don't know how long it will take, or what additional insights will come of this. But I want it to change ME first.

XM151: A Master's Course in Comedy

Do you want to learn how to write comedy? Get an XM Radio, tune it to 151, and leave it there.

 

My wife and I bought a new car two weeks ago, and I've listened to 151 almost non-stop. From an early age, my Dad nurtured my interest in comedy by exposing me to the great comedians and teams who were funny without being vulgar. XM 151 has been like a refresher course in good, clean, FUNNY comedy: Mel Brooks and Carl Reiner; Bill Dana, aka Jose Jimenez; Tom Lehrer; Rowan and Martin's Laugh-In; Paul Lynde; the Smothers Brothers; Albert Brooks; Weird Al Yankovic; Henny Youngman; Bob and Ray (with Bob Elliot, father of Chris Elliot); Stiller and Meara (aka Ben Stiller's parents); Bill Cosby; Bob Newhart; Jerry Clower; Emo Phillips; and my great heroes, Mike Nichols and Elaine May. If you don't know these names, search for them, listen to them, and learn from them.

 

XM 151, aka Laugh USA is the "clean" comedy channel. There is some PG material with the occasional innuendo and mild cuss word (if such a thing exists), but it's fairly good listening. They also play several Christian comedians.