Something I just wrote for a series about the armor of God. This goes with the helmet of salvation, if you couldn't guess.
SKIT - Who Needs a Helmet?
By John Cosper
www.righteousinsanity.com
CHARACTERS
Coach Gabbard
Coach McDonald
Alex- Quarterback
Howard- PA Announcer
The coaches enter stage left and walk to center as Howard speaks.
HOWARD: Sweeney returns the punt ten yards on a fifty yard kick from Hamilton, and the Cougars will take over the ball at their own thirty-one yard line with the score, Cougars 87, Warriors 3.
GABBARD: Well, coach, looks like we’re going to state again!
MCDONALD: That we are, coach. All we gotta do is run out the clock.
GABBARD: And make sure nobody gets hurt.
MCDONALD: Should we pull Alex out of the game?
GABBARD: No, no need for that. He’ll be fine.
MCDONALD: Are you sure?
GABBARD: There’s less than a minute on the clock. What could possibly go wrong?
MCDONALD: All right. Send him in.
GABBARD: Alex! Get over here!
Alex runs on from stage left. He is in a football uniform but does not carry a helmet.
ALEX: Hey coach! Did you know I’ve thrown for over five hundred yards today?
GABBARD: Doesn’t surprise me in the least, son.
MCDONALD: Every college in America’s gonna be calling you on Monday.
ALEX: Oh boy!
GABBARD: Now get in there and finish this!
ALEX: Yes, sir!
Alex starts to run on.
MCDONALD: Whoa, hold on there a minute, son! Where’s your helmet?
ALEX: Oh, right. I left it on the bench.
MCDONALD: Don’t you think you’ll need it?
ALEX: What for? It’s only a minute to go. I’ll be fine.
GABBARD: Yeah, he’ll be just fine.
MCDONALD: Are you crazy? You can’t take the field without a helmet!
ALEX: I can go without a helmet just this once. What’s it going to hurt?
GABBARD: All he’s gonna do is take a knee.
ALEX: Come on, it’ll look great for the paper tomorrow. They can see my face.
GABBARD: From South Bend to Tuscaloosa. Get in there, champ!
Alex runs off stage right.
MCDONALD: I don’t know about this.
GABBARD: He’ll be fine. He’s a tough guy. And all he’s gonna do is take a knee.
MCDONALD: But what if they get him? What he he gets hit in the head?
GABBARD: The way they’ve been playing today? It would take a miracle.
Alex screams. Gabbard and McDonald react in horror.
HOWARD: Simpkins takes the snap, and he is clobbered at the line. Wow! I tell you, I’ve never seen a hit like that before. Gee golly, he hit him so hard, I think his face may literally have fallen off his skull.
MCDONALD: Nooooooo!
HOWARD: Yes, his face was knocked off his skull. Get a mop, we’ve got a clean up on the twenty yard line.
GABBARD: There goes the state championship.
MCDONALD: Who cares about that? There goes Alex’s face!
HOWARD: It looks like there’s an eyeball on the fifteen yard line. I repeat, an eyeball on the fifteen.
MCDONALD: I told you not to send him out there without a helmet.
GABBARD: My car’s parked back behind the visitor’s bleacher. If we go now, they’ll never know we were here.
Gabbard and McDonald tiptoe off stage left.
HOWARD: It’ll be first and twenty six from the fifteen yard line, just as soon as they can find his lips.
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