New skit: Hollywood Is Out of Touch

Sometimes subtlety is a good thing. Sometimes it's just fun to be overt and blunt. There's a little Norm McDonald influence in this one. 

Hollywood Is Out of Touch

By John Cosper

www.righteousinsanity.com

 

CHARACTERS

Wayne and Wanda- A Christian couple

Cheryl- A glamorous movie star

Ron- A great actor, supposedly

 

Wayne and Wanda are watching TV.

 

ANNOUNCER: And now, to present the award for best actor, please welcome Cheryl Starr!

 

Music plays on the TV

 

WANDA: Oh, I just love the Oscars, don't you?

WAYNE: Ehhh, it's okay.

WANDA: What's the matter?

WAYNE: I don't know. It just seems to me that Hollywood is out of touch.

WANDA: What do you mean?

WAYNE: Well for one thing, they never nominate Batman for anything.

WANDA: The Oscars are about art and great achievement, not what's popular.

WAYNE: So how come the only art they nominate for awards is art that goes against everything that is good and right?

WANDA: Wayne, you're starting to sound like my father.

WAYNE: I'm just saying Hollywood lost touch with good values and morals a long time ago.

WANDA: Oh don't be silly.

CHERYL: And the nominees are...

 

Wayne and Wanda turn to the TV.

 

CHERYL: Carl Adams for his tender portrayal of a sensitive, misunderstood man in "The Wife Beater."

 

Applause.

 

CHERYL: Don Cooper for his touching performance as a serial killer whose mother never loved him in "Die Mommy Die, Die, Die!"

 

Applause.

 

CHERYL: Jeremy Gardener for his performance of man who ran a dog fighting ring in "Ed Green: The True Story of a Man Who Loved Dogs Too Much." 

 

Applause.

 

CHERYL: Martin Roberts, for his portrayal of a beautiful man who just wanted to make the world a better place in "Our Pal Hitler."

 

Applause.

 

CHERYL: And Ron Woods for his career-making turn as the most misunderstood figure in history in "Satan: The Beautiful Creature God Threw Away."

 

Applause.

 

CHERYL: And the winner is...YES! Ron Woods for "Satan: The Beautiful Creature God Threw Away!"

 

Huge applause and cheers, music swells.

 

RON: Wow, what a shock. It was just an honor to be nominated among so many great men playing so many great roles, but as much as I want to say thank you to the voters, this award really belongs to someone else. Someone very dear to all of us. This is for you, Satan! God might hate you, but we love you!

 

Thunderous applause. Wayne turns to Wanda.

 

WAYNE: You were saying?