Righteous Insanity

The Essentials - A new skit!

The Essentials
By John Cosper
Righteousinsanity.com

CHARACTERS
Pastor
Meredith- A new believer
Larry, Doreen, Frank, Melanie- Biased believers
Jesus

Pastor is on stage with Meredith.

PASTOR: And this is Meredith Baker. Meredith comes forward today making her confession of faith. She'll be baptized after tonight's service. Be sure to come up and welcome her into the family of God after the service.

Pastor exits. Larry enters. (Note: Larry and all the other church members should have an armload of fliers, booklets, and other items to hand Meredith, as mentioned in the dialogue. Weigh her down with as much junk as possible.)

LARRY: Well, well, Meredith, huh? Welcome to the family of God, sister. We're sure happy you decided to join us. Here's your membership card in the Republican Party. Here's your pro-life bumper sticker, and of course, your NRA decal for the back window of your car. You display these things with pride, now. These are the marks of a true believer. Glad to have ya.

Larry exits. Doreen enters.

DOREEN: It is so good to have you join us. My name is Doreen, and in case you didn't know already, I lead the home school moms group that meets every Thursday morning. I know you'll want to be there because, let's face it, Christians can't send their kids to public schools any more. We're going to have a guest speaker in from the national office talking about ten new ways to shelter our children from the world. Be sure and bring a casserole or dessert.

Doreen exits. Frank enters.

FRANK: Hi, Meredith. My name's Frank, and these are you offering envelopes. Remember, ten percent is the minimum, but also remember, we're not looking for believers who give the bare minimum, okay? Wise stewards find a way to give more. Oh, and if you have debts, I have a new God's Money class starting next Monday. Registration is $130. See ya soon!

Frank exits. Melanie enters.

MELANIE: Well bless God, and bless you, sister. It's so good to see you here. Here's the instructions for reprogramming your TV remote. Now that you're a Christian, you need to avoid the sinful garbage on TV shows. Stick to TBN and reality programs that don't involve males and females doing overnights. Also, my husband and I offer a ministry where we can come to your house and personally remove and burn all the immoral books, movies, magazines, and music you might have. And for $5 a month, we can filter your Internet. Okay? Bless you, Meredith. So glad you joined us.

Jesus enters. He sees all the stuff that people have given Meredith. She looks very overwhelmed. He takes away the stickers, the fliers, etc and tosses them all aside.

JESUS: Come on. Follow me.

Meredith smiles and follows Jesus.

Righteous Insanity Films - Coming Soon

I decided it might be a good idea to write down all the film projects in the works at RI. Here's a quick run down of what's coming, including info on how you can get involved!

God Told Me To Break Up With You (Post-Production)
Filmed almost four years ago, RI's popular tale of the Christian singles world should be finished this summer... with the possible exception of the "lost" scene that held up its completion. Three scenes are now finished and online in short film format: Denial, How to Pick Up a Christian Babe, and God Told Me To Break Up With You.

Yet (Pre-Production)
A comedic drama about four singles who just haven't found what they're looking for... yet. Natalie Nicole Gilbert (How to Pick Up a Christian Babe) will star and produce from the script she wrote with John Cosper. Filming this summer in LA.

Med 814 (Pre-Production/Casting)
A sci-fi story told in 14 shorts, based on the short story by John Cosper about a conspiracy to eradicate religion with psychotic drugs. Now seeking directors and actors with cameras who would like to get involved. For information, please email johncosper@yahoo.com

The Sensitive Christian Man (Pre-Production)
Eight short films for men's ministry on a wide range of issues. John Cosper, Denny Grinar (Adam and Eve, Never Cheat on a Super Hero), and Tyler Bradley (Baptist Eye for the Catholic Guy) are currently cast. Filming this summer.

Chasing Leia (Pre-Production)
Remake of RI's first film, about a Star Wars fan who falls for a Trekkie. RI regular Denny Grinar will make his directorial debut with this short. Filming in 2008.

Wing Man (In development)
A mockumentary about a super hero sidekick who has to seek a new career in the private sector. Produced by John Cosper and Denny Grinar.

Tolerance (In development)
A short film based on the short story by John Cosper. Aliens live among us, and, in the interest of tolerance, all science fiction featuring bad or hostile aliens has become contraband. Now seeking a co-producer/director who can make this happen sooner rather than later. For more information email johncosper@yahoo.com

Fluffy 2 (In development)
They're baaaaaaack! Trish Angel reunites with fellow former astronaut Stone Brockman to do battle with the cute and fuzzy homicidal aliens again. Script now in development.

For information on any of these projects, email johncosper@yahoo.com

You can also read Med 814 or Tolerance online at www.lunarshuttletickets.com

Bring the Bard Home: A new ebook for Home School Drama Teachers

Shakespeare is one of the most challenging undertakings for any actor or director. It's also one of the most rewarding, and a vital part of any classical literary education. Now, Righteous Insanity offers you a unique introduction to Shakespeare that will get you and your students excited about studying the world's most famous playwright.

"Bring the Bard Home" is a brief, jam-packed intro to the works of Shakespeare. This ebook will help you get started choosing a play, guide you through auditions and rehearsals, and give you educational exercises beyond the stage productions that will challenge and inspire your students.

"Bring the Bard Home" is only $5.00, and is one of many resources for Home Schoolers available through Righteous Insanity. Get the book today at shop.righteousinsanity.com

Film makers and actors wanted!!

Righteous Insanity, a Christian drama and film production company, is seeking film makers and actors to help shoot a sci-fi story in 14 parts. This is a unique story and series, and you do NOT have to be located near me (in Louisville) to play a part. We're not looking for "pros." Just folks with a DV camera, a good eye, and some acting talent.

If you are interested, please email me at johncosper@yahoo.com

This is a story told from different angles, requiring a number of actors and different types of shoots. There's no pay, but this is a chance to be a part of something unique, get a credit, and let your talent shine. You can take on a little or a lot; it's all up to you, so long as you can get the job done.

Film makers and actors wanted!!

Righteous Insanity, a Christian drama and film production company, is seeking film makers and actors to help shoot a sci-fi story in 14 parts. This is a unique story and series, and you do NOT have to be located near me (in Louisville) to play a part. We're not looking for "pros." Just folks with a DV camera, a good eye, and some acting talent.

If you are interested, please email me at johncosper@yahoo.com

This is a story told from different angles, requiring a number of actors and different types of shoots. There's no pay, but this is a chance to be a part of something unique, get a credit, and let your talent shine. You can take on a little or a lot; it's all up to you, so long as you can get the job done.

New Film - God Told Me To Break Up With You

Here's another new clip from an OLD film shoot. This is the opening scene from "God Told Me to Break Up With You", starring Randy D. Pease and Sara Lacy. Enjoy!

Favorite scenes - What inspires you?

We were at my father in law's house the other night, watching The Truman Show. My wife had never seen the movie, and we ended up sticking around, keeping everyone up, so that she could see one of my all time favorite movie scenes. It's the scene right before Truman is reunited with his father, when he's sitting on the edge of the dock with his best friend. Truman has come to believe there's some sort of conspiracy, that everyone is watching him, that his whole life may be a facade. His friend is assuring him it's all real, that no one is lying to him. After all, if this was a big conspiracy, he'd have to be in on it too.

It is during this dialogue we get the first look inside the television control room of The Truman Show, where the producer, Christof, is feeding the best friend his lines. It's an eery moment. Truman has all the trust in the world that his best friend can be believed, and yet... his best friend is feeding him lies straight from the devil himself. It gives me chills every time.

This led to a discussion of favorite scenes in movies. Not the movies themselves, but the best scenes, the ones you'd keep people waiting just to watch one more time (even though you have it on video). It's a good study for any writer: what scenes in movies inspire or touch you the most?

Being a comedy writer, my list includes a few more comedy scenes than most. These are in no order, and are subject to change, should I be reminded of something I forgot.

- The end of "The Usual Suspects." This scene doesn't shock people like it did originally for reasons I won't go into (and I still won't give it away here), but when I first saw the movie, I went from half-asleep to wide awake, mouth wide open. It was a phenomenal twist.

- The speeder bike chase in "Return of the Jedi." This scene cannot be fully appreciated unless you see it up close in a theater on a BIG screen.

- The death of the horse in "Animal House." My wife thinks I'm sick, but this scene makes me laugh so hard every time. I'm including the heart attack scene, and the one that follows, with the handiman, the tape measure, and the chainsaw. This ranks just above the horse getting punched out in "Blazing Saddles", but just below the drunk horse leaning against a wall in "Cat Ballou."

- Christopher Walken in “Pulp Fiction.” Monologues are often the death of movies, but this monologue amazes me. It’s a powerfully dramatic speech by Walken, as a soldier delivering an heirloom to the son of a fallen comrade, that draws you in – then sucker punches you with a twist making it the most awkward, gross, and ludicrous story a young man ever had to endure about his father.

- The stateroom scene from "A Night at the Opera." Grouch Marx's constant banter alongside the building gag of dozens of people piling into a tiny room on a cruise ship. A classic gag.

- The fountain scene in Clooney's "Oceans 11." Not sure why I love this scene so much. There's no dialogue, and none needed. It's a curtain call for a great ensemble cast, and the final bow goes to Carl Reiner. Sweetness.

- "Stonehenge" from "This is Spinal Tap." Making a big thing of it might have been a good idea.

- The "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" gunfight in "Face/Off." Proof that no one does violence like John Woo.

- Woody Allen plays cello in the marching band in "Take the Money and Run." I was a band geek, so this means a little more. Woody is so brilliant. Honorable mention would be Woody ordering lunch for the guerilla freedom fighters army in "Bananas."

- The final dogfight in "Top Gun." This movie didn't deserve to be a classic. The script is garbage, the dialogue is horrible, the characters are completely flat. Ironically, they got everything else right - especially the dogfighting shots - and it works.

- Gene Kelly performing the title song in "Singin' in the Rain." The greatest musical number ever filmed in my favorite movie musical.

- The first scene with Gene Wilder and Zero Mostel in "The Producers." I used to think this was the funniest scene ever written. Then I saw Nathan Lane and Matthew Broderick do it in the remake. Not that they weren't funny, but they just couldn't match the insanity of Wilder and Mostel.

- Charlie Sheen's cameo in "Ferris Bueller's Day Off." Another scene where I can't stop laughing. Charlie Sheen is a master of deadpan comedy, and this scene steals the whole movie. It's why the movie is in my top 3, and I never miss a Charlie Sheen comedy.

Self Promotion

Marketing guru Seth Godin had a blog yesterday that really struck me. This was worth sharing with anyone in ministry. It's a good set of questions we should always ask ourselves.

http://sethgodin.typepad.com/seths_blog/2008/04/self-promotion.html

New skit - Silencing the Truth

For every teacher, employee, and believer who felt they had to stay silent while school, work, or political correctness promoted something you know to be wrong... this skit is for you. Be bold, and speak the truth in love. Always.

Silencing the Truth
By John Cosper

CHARACTERS
Mr. Frank- A Principal
Glenda- A crossing guard

Frank sits at a desk in a principal's office. Glenda enters the principal's office in her crossing guard gear.

GLENDA: You wanted to see me, Mr. Frank?
FRANK: Glenda, please sit down.
GLENDA: All right.
FRANK: Glenda, you've been a faithful volunteer here at Shermer High School since, well, since I was going here. You have a great heart. You love the kids. You love the school.
GLENDA: Thank you. It's my pleasure to serve.
FRANK: That makes this all the more difficult for me. You see, the school board has received some complaints about you.
GLENDA: Have they?
FRANK: It seems that you've been voicing some opinions to the students that, well, have disrupted the harmony and the spirit here at Shermer.
GLENDA: What sort of comments?
FRANK: I think you know what I mean, Glenda. I think you know.
GLENDA: Is this about those two boys that I caught--
FRANK: Yes, Glenda, it is.
GLENDA: But Mr. Frank, what those boys were doing was wrong.
FRANK: According to whom, Glenda?
GLENDA: What do you mean, according to whom? What they were doing has always been against the rules.
FRANK: Times have changed, Glenda. The culture has evolved, and things we once considered to be taboo... well, they're becoming accepted.
GLENDA: But surely you don't want me to condone their behavior! It's dangerous! And the more other kids see them, the more others will try it. Where does it end?
FRANK: Glenda, this is not open for discussion. We've had a meeting with the school board, and their decision was unanimous. They want you to resign.
GLENDA: No! They can't remove me for this!
FRANK: They can, and they will, unless you are willing to go on the record with an apology to those boys, and a remission of the views you expressed to them and the other students on this matter.
GLENDA: I can't do that, Mr. Frank. You know as well as I do it's wrong.
FRANK: Look, off the record, I agree with you. But here in the hallowed halls of Shermer, I must adhere to the school policy regarding insensitive comments and tolerance.
GLENDA: Well, I guess that's it. I have to resign.
FRANK: Don't say that, Glenda. Take some time to think about it.
GLENDA: There's nothing think about. What's right is right, what's wrong is wrong. And I will not speak otherwise.
FRANK: Then I'm sorry, Glenda.
GLENDA: I can only pray those boys, and any others that follow them will be okay.
FRANK: Do whatever you want, Glenda. Just know that as long as those boys are students here at Shermer High School, they and others have the freedom to jaywalk and cross the street outside the properly marked crosswalks without fear of prejudice or reprisal.

Glenda walks out.

New Skit - King Solomon's Court

King Solomon's Court
By John Cosper
www.righteousinsanity.com

CHARACTERS
TV Announcer
King Solomon
Bill and Dwayne - Former business partners
Vic and Tina - Former married couple
Helen - A car owner
Butch - An auto repairman
Charlie and Howard - Former roommates

Court TV show theme music plays. Bill and Dwayne enter.

ANNOUNCER: This is Bill Cobb and Dwayne Jones. Cobb and Jones opened a lawn service in 2005 as a 50/50 partnership. Now the partners want to part ways, and both of them have laid claim to the company's only mower. These people are not actors. They are real litigants who have agreed to have their dispute settled in out forum: King Solomon's Court.

Solomon enters.

SOLOMON: Okay, gentlemen, I have read your complaint. Mr. Cobb, I understand you made the transaction to buy the mower.
BILL: Yes, sir.
SOLOMON: And Mr. Jones, you put in half the money and did all the mowing.
DWAYNE: I did.
SOLOMON: I've examined your financial records. Both of you put in half the money at the beginning of the partnership.
BILL: Correct.
SOLOMON: And I see you have equitably split all of the assets except this mower.
DWAYNE: That's right, your honor.
SOLOMON: It is the decision of this court that the mower will be cut in half, and you will both get half a mower.
DWAYNE: Wait! Your honor, don't do that. This isn't the mower's fault. Let Bill have it.
SOLOMON: In light of your heartfelt request, I hereby award the mower to Dwayne Jones.

Solomon bangs his gavel. Bill and Dwayne exit. Music plays. Vic and Tina enter.

ANNOUNCER: This is Vic and Tina Saccone. After ten years of marriage, they've agreed to divorce. But who gets the family poodle?
SOLOMON: Mr. Saccone, it says here you bought the poodle, alias Muffet, shortly after the marriage began.
VIC: I did.
SOLOMON: This court rules that the poodle will be cut in half, and half given to each litigant.
TINA: No! Not my little Muffet! He can have the poodle!
SOLOMON: Court awards custody to Tina Saccone.

Solomon bangs his gavel. Tina and Vic exit. Helen and Butch enter. Music plays.

ANNOUNCER: This is Butch Greer and Helen Buchanan. Helen took her car to the shop for a simple repair, and Butch charged her over $3000. When she refused to pay, he kept the car.
SOLOMON: Mrs. Buchanan, you claim the car is yours.
HELEN: Yes, sir. I have the pink slips here.
SOLOMON: Mr. Greer, you claimed possession based on her refusal to pay for repairs.
BUTCH: The car ain't worth two grand, y'honor.
SOLOMON: Court rules that the car will be cut in half and split between the two parties.
BUTCH: Aw, come on, y'honor. If that's the way you do things, give her the whole car.
SOLOMON: Court rules in favor of Mr. Greer.

Solomon bangs his gavel.

HELEN: That's not fair!
SOLOMON: Court finds Mrs. Buchanan is in contempt. If she resists arrest, cut her in half/

Butch and Helen exit. Music plays. Charlie and Howard enter.

ANNOUNCER: This is Charlie Brewer and Howard Wilson. The two rented an apartment in Brewer's name, but Wilson claims he paid all the rent.
SOLOMON: Mr. Brewer, I see the apartment is in your name.
CHARLIE: That's right, your honor. It's mine.
SOLOMON: And Mr. Wilson, I have your canceled checks for rent payments.
HOWARD: Yes, your honor.
SOLOMON: In light of the evidence, this court rules--

Solomon and the litigants freeze.

ANNOUNCER: How will King Solomon rule? Who will get the apartment? Find out when we return.